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All posts for the month 2015年6月

You’ll never regret it

Published 2015-06-30 by joejoy12

Time is running out for my friend. While we are sitting at lunch she casually mentions she and her husband are thinking of starting a family. “We’re taking a survey,”she says, half-joking. “Do you think I should have a baby?”

“It will change your life,” I say, carefully keeping my tone neutral. “I know,”she says, “no more sleeping in on weekends, no more spontaneous holidays…”

But that’s not what I mean at all. I look at my friend, trying to decide what to tell her. I want her to know what she will never learn in childbirth classes. I want to tell her that the physical wounds of child bearing will heal, but becoming a mother will leave her with an emotional wound so raw that she will be vulnerable forever.

I consider warning her that she will never again read a newspaper without thinking: “What if that had been MY child?” That every plane crash, every house fire will haunt her. That when she sees pictures of starving children, she will wonder if anything could be worse than watching your child die. I look at her carefully manicured nails and stylish suit and think that no matter how sophisticated she is, becoming a mother will reduce her to the primitive level of a bear protecting her cub.

I feel I should warn her that no matter how many years she has invested in her career, she will be professionally derailed by motherhood. She might arrange for child care, but one day she will be going into an important business meeting, and she will think her baby’s sweet smell. She will have to use every ounce of discipline to keep from running home, just to make sure her child is all right.

I want my friend to know that every decision will no longer be routine. That a five-year-old boy’s desire to go to the men’s room rather than the women’s at a restaurant will become a major dilemma. The issues of independence and gender identity will be weighed against the prospect that a child molester may be lurking in the lavatory. However decisive she may be at the office, she will second-guess herself constantly as a mother.

Looking at my attractive friend, I want to assure her that eventually she will shed the added weight of pregnancy, but she will never feel the same about herself. That her own life, now so important, will be of less value to her once she has a child. She would give it up in a moment to save her offspring, but will also begin to hope for more years—not to accomplish her own dreams—but to watch her children accomplish theirs.

I want to describe to my friend the exhilaration of seeing your child learn to hit a ball. I want to capture for her the belly laugh of a baby who is touching the soft fur of a dog for the first time. I want her to taste the joy that is so real it hurts.

My friend’s look makes me realize that tears have formed in my eyes. “You’ll never regret it,” I say finally. Then, squeezing my friend’s hand, I offer a prayer for her and me and all of the mere mortal women who stumble their way into this holiest of callings.5cfc088ejw1etkpfyo07hj20dw0dwgn0

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All woman born for loving

Published 2015-06-29 by joejoy12

A little boy asked his mother:”Why are you crying?”

“Because I am a woman.”She told him.

“I don’t understand”he said.

His mum just hugged him and said:”And you never will.”

Later the little boy asked his father:”Why does mother seem to cry for no reason?”

“All woman cry for no reason.”Was all his dad could say.

The little boy grow up and became a man, still wondering why women cry.

Finally he put in a call to God, when God got on the phone, he asked,”God, why do women cry so easily?”

God said:”When I made the women, she had to be special. I made her shoulders strong enough to carry the weight of the world; yet, gentle enough to give comfort.

I gave her inner strength to endure childbirth, and the rejections many times comes from her children.

I gave her hardness that allows her to keep going when everyone else gives up, and take care of her family through sickness and fatigue without complains.

“I gave her the sensitivity to love her children under any and all circumstances, even her children has hurt her very badly.

“I gave her strength to carry her husband through his faults and fashioned her from his rib to protect his heart.”

“I gave her the wisdom to know that a good husband never hurts his wife, but sometimes tests her strength and resolve to stand beside him unfalteringly.”

“And finally, I gave her a tear to shed. That is her exclusively to use whenever it is needed.”

“You see the beauty of a women is not the clothes she wears, the figure she carries, or the way she combs her hair.”

“The beauty of a women must be seen in her eyes, because that is the doorway to her heart, the place where the love resides.”63e5c1e1jw1ethaxtr576j20c8084gma

The Joy of Living

Published 2015-06-26 by joejoy12

Joy in living comes from having fine emotions, trusting them, giving them the freedom of a bird in the open. Joy in living can never be assumed as a pose, or put on from the outside as a mask. People who have this joy don not need to talk about it; they radiate it. They just live out their joy and let it splash its sunlight and glow into other lives as naturally as bird sings.

We can never get it by working for it directly. It comes, like happiness, to those who are aiming at something higher. It is a byproduct of great, simple living. The joy of living comes from what we put into living, not from what we seek to get from it.QQ图片20150626111422

Tactics for Job-hunt Success

Published 2015-06-25 by joejoy12

If you’re finding it tough to land a job,try expanding your job-hunting plan to include the following tactics:

Set your target.While you should always keep your options open to compromise,you should also be sure to target exactly what you want in a job.A specific job hunt will be more efficient than a haphazard one.

Schedule ample interviews.Use every possible method to get interviews——answering ads,using search firms,contacting companies directly,surfing the Web,and networking.Even if a job is not perfect for you,every interview can be approached as a positive experience.

Follow up.Even if someone does not hire you,write them a thank-you note for the interview.Then,some weeks later,send another brief letter to explain that you still have not found the perfect position and that you will be available to interview again if the original position you applied for——or any other position,for that matter——is open.Do this with every position you interview for,and you may just catch a break.

Make it your full-time job.You can’t find a job by looking sporadically。You have to make time for it.If you’re unemployed and looking,devote as much time as you would to a full-time job.If you have a job while you’re looking,figure out an organized schedule to maximize your searching time.

Network vertically。In the research phase of your job hunt,talk to people who are on a level above you in your desired industry.They’ll have some insights that people at your own level won’t have,and will be in a good position to hire you or recommend you to be hired.Keep your spirits up.Looking for a job is one of the toughest things you will ever have to do.Maintain your confidence,stay persistent,and think positively,and eventually you will get a job that suits you.QQ图片20150624142020

The gift of Love

Published 2015-06-24 by joejoy12

If I speak in the tongues of mortals and of angels, but do not have love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. If I give away all my possessions, and if I hand over my body so that I may boast, but do not have love, I gain nothing.

Love is patient; love is kind; love is not envious or boastful or arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice in wrongdoing, but rejoices in the truth. It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

Love never ends. But as for prophecies, they will come to an end; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will come to an end. For we know only in part, and we prophesy only in part; but when the complete comes, the partial will come to an end. When I was a child, I thought like a child; when I became and adult, I put an end to childish ways. For now we see in mirror, dimly, but then we will see face to face. Now I know only in part; then I will know fully, even as I have been fully known. And now faith, hope, and love abide, these three; and the greatest of these is love.QQ图片20150617173029

Eyes can speak

Published 2015-06-23 by joejoy12

Much meaning can be conveyed, clearly, with our eyes, so it is often said that eyes can speak.

Do you have such kind of experience? In a bus you may look at stranger, but not too long. And if he is sensing that he is being stared at, he may feel uncomfortable.

The same in daily life. If you are looked at for more than necessary, you will look at yourself up and down, to see if there is anything wrong with you. If nothing goes wrong, you will feel angry toward other’s stare with you that way. Eyes do speak, right?

Looking too long at someone may seem to be rude and aggressive. But things are different when it comes to stare at the opposite sex. If a man glances at a woman for more than 10 seconds and refuses to avert his gaze, his intentions are obvious, that is, he wishes to attract her attention, to make her understand that he is admiring her.

However, the normal eye contact for two people engaged in conversation is that the speaker will only look at the listener from time to time, in order to make sure that the listener does pay attention to what the former is speaking, to tell him that he is attentive.

If a speaker looks at you continuously when speaking, as if he tries to dominate you, you will feel disconcerted. A poor liar usually exposes himself by looking too long at the victim, since he believes in the false idea that to look straight in the eye is a sign of honest communication. Quite the contrary.

In fact, continuous eye contact is confined to lovers only, who will enjoy looking at each other tenderly for a long time, to show affection that words cannot express.

Evidently, eye contact should be done according to the relationship between two people and the specific situation.

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Relish the Moment

Published 2015-06-19 by joejoy12

Tucked away in our subconsciousness is an idyllic vision. We see ourselves on a long trip that spans the continent. We are travelling by train. Out the windows, we drink in the passing scene of cars on nearby highways, of children waving on a crossing, of cattle grazing on a distant hillside, of smoke pouring from a power plant, of row upon row of corn and wheat, of flatlands and valleys, of mountains and rolling hillsides, of city skylines and village halls.
But the uppermost in our minds is the final destination. On a certain day at a certain hour, we will pull into the station. Bands will be playing and flags waving. Once we reach there, so many wonderful dreams will come true and the pieces of our lives will be fit together like a completed jigsaw puzzle. How restlessly we pace the aisles, damning the minutes loitering, waiting, waiting, waiting for the station.
“When we reach the station, that will be it”, we cry. “When I’m 18”, “When I buy a new 450SL Mercedes Benz”, “When I put my last kid through collage”, “When I have paid off the mortgage”, “When I get a promotion”, “When I reach the age of the retirement, I shall live happily ever after.”
Sooner or later, we must realize that there is no station, no one place to arrive at once and for all. The true joy of life is the trip. The station is only a dream. It constantly outdistances us.
“Relish the moment” is a good motto, especially when coupled withe the Psalm 118:24:”This is the day which the Lord hath made, we will rejoice and be glad in it.” It isn’t the burdens of today that drive men mad. It is the regrets over yesterday and the fear of tommorrow. Reget and fear are twin thieves who rob us of today.
So stop pacing the aisles and counting the miles. Instead, climb more mountains, eat more icecreams, go barefoot more often, swim more rivers, watch more sunsets, laugh more and cry less. Life must be lived as we go along. Then the station will come soon enough.17323571520130131221443062_640